Saturday, June 8, 2013


APRIL 25, 2013

Haha I loved your bilingual attempt, Madre.

Also I have been feeling alot better than I was. There are some lingering symptoms. But I have received two Priesthood blessings, one of which said that I will be healed from all of this :)

So I hold on to that heavenly promise.
AND I am being transferred to Dove Creek Colorado tomorrow! I am on "special assignment" and will be Sister Macaldo :) She is from the Philippines! Basically, she is a temple square sister who has come
to our mission to experience tracting and teaching lessons..all that good stuff. And President has asked me to basically show her a good time this last transfer in our mission.
My time is almost up. I spent to much time reading e-mails and not enough time responding. I am sorry to the people I didnt respond to!!

Oh!! also we have been told that we shouldnt have blogs...again for safety purposes. We will have to come up with another way of getting this info out and about so please be brain storming.

I love you!!!

MAY 6, 2013
Thanks for the kind words, mom. When we talked last night you apologized and said that your words would be redundant. However...Yes, they were the same words you spoke last night but regardless they bring me so much comfort. Thank you.

Again, I feel so heavy that words are hard to get out. But I know with a sureness that Chaz is ok...Bishop Olsen called me today and told me about a friend that he lost when he was a younger man. During this hard time Bishop Olsen's Bishop told him that "some people become as good as their ever going to become in this life and so the Lord snatches them up and takes them to their next phase of existence" That wasn't the direct quote but it was close. Bishop said that those words stuck with him and now they will stick with me. I know that I have felt Chaz near me these past few days and believe with all my heart that there really and truly is life after physical death.

Thank you again for you love. mom.

Lori e-mailed me.

I can't lie though...this whole experience with grief and loss has made me feel a little guilty. It makes me think back to when you were suffering the death of Mike...I could have been more patient with your suffering and I wasn’t. Now I know how it feels to have people not understand the pain you felt. Please forgive me for that.

MAY 13, 2013

Hey mama,

Since we talked last night I spent a little more time writting people back who's email had been sitting in my box for quite sometime. Hope that's ok? Also it was SO SO SO good talking to you last night! You sound great. How are the adventures of figuring out your new camera going?

Also..I have a thought. I think my garment waist band may be hindering my that possible. The elastic band goes right acrossed my tummy parts.

But asked if I need anything. Music is always a go to. that and those little nylon sockies and granola bars :)
I love you mama. And don't want you to worry about me, ok? replace the worries with prayer :)

MAY 20, 2013

Haha Yea! How do people in Aztec know about missionaries in Dove Creek. haha that's funny.
Also no more news about Chazer. But he was Cremated and my dad received his ashes in the mail the other day. They will spread the ashes in Sedona, Arizona. It was one of Chaz's favorite places. There is a lot of positive vibes in that place.
And about the garments, a bigger size might be good. Maybe just 3 pairs and we'll see how that goes.

That is SOOOOOO great that Mckale is sending those papers in. wow....I'm so proud of her. Please let her know that many trials will come to her in these next few months and that she need only pray to her Father for the strength to overcome. Patti and Ron will be empty nesters!!

How is Mitchell? Jacob? and Jack??? Also I will check the mail everyday this week and get that insurance letter sent off to you asap. Poor maxi. She lasted a lot longer than we thought she would. What's the game plan now that she is done-zo?

Our 3 new investigators are good. 1 is being difficult haha we can't seem to get a second appointment with them but we will see the other two tomorrow.

Also we get to do service tomorrow at a mini track meet called field day!!! I'm so excited :):):):) Also we spoke in Sacrament meeting yesterday! Love doing that. I spoke about faith hope and charity and how having the 3 will improve life and prepare us for the 2nd coming of the Savior.

Lastly, thank you for sending that package.

My tummy has really been wicked these past few weeks but I know it will get better.

Everyday I feel Chaz near and feel the Lord's tender mercies all around.

OH! and there are zero wards in Dove Creek. We have one little Branch. But the goal is to

establish a branch here in Dove Creek. We go to church in Utah right now and it's about

a 3 minute drive.

I love you! Talk to you next week

JUNE 6, 2013
Poem I sent to Jade after Chaz past away.....

"Native American Prayer"

I give you this one thought to keep -

I am with you still - I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on snow,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning's hush,

I am the sweet uplifting rush,

of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft starts that shine at night.

Do not think of me as gone -

I am with you still in each new dawn.

Author: Native American Prayer

From: Jade Swayne <>

Subject: Re: Hi Junebug!!

To: "Penny Paxman" <>

Date: Monday, June 3, 2013, 12:58 PM

First question....Did you write that poem that you sent me? It really hit me. Made me cry and everything. And not any of that sniffle sniffle pat your eyes dry kind of crying. It was more like tears pouring down your face combo-ed with snot kind of crying. Thank you. And those pictures. Thank you thank you!

Also you asked me about that camera cord I don't know what kind I need. But I do know that I have a Sony Cyber-shot camera....maybe that helps??....We aren't going to Wal-mart on P-day's takes up most of our day and seeing as we have been working so hard out here in the DC it's hard to skip out on that day of rest. You start looking like the walking dead hahaha.

BUT! good news :) I go a call from President Batt on Saturday and he has asked me to be a trainer again :) So there will be 3 sisters in Dove Creek until the 12th. That's when my perfect companion, Sister Macaldo goes home. Then it will be myself and the new sister hitting the streets. I feel a little nervous but very excited :) We will drive into Farmington at 5 and spend the night with the sister that are over Kylie's ward. Then on Tuesday morning we will go to the mission office for the trainers meeting.

Oh before I forget!! How old is Simone going to be tomorrow??!!

Also I think I should be good with the garments I have. My tummy isn't as bloated as it was those past weeks. Oh and could you do some Gale bladder research for me. What do these things do? A lot of people wonder if that's what is causing all of the haul-a-bu-louuuu in my bowels. It would be worth a gander to see if that's the case, right?

Can you print this out and give it to Mitch :)


the last two are videos.

Also thank them for the letters they sent. they were so sweet.

And now I've got to go! Even e-mail time goes by much too fast! I love you!!

Love this work!
Don't give up on God. His blessings are eternal :)
Love you like a plate full of angel hair and ham steak!

This one is for you mama. Your struggles can be your greatest strengths after you overcome